Yesterday on my way home from work I started to think about everything I needed to get done.
Stop at the store for dinner, drive home. Put away the clean dishes. Wash dirty dishes. Empty Chris' lunchbox. Take the clean clothes out of the dryer, start a new load. Peel the shrimp, cut up the vegetables, cook dinner. Take a shower. Dry the new load of laundry. Wash dinner dishes.
This then led to me starting to think about everything I need to get done in the next few weeks.
Buy a pack n play. Buy nursing bras. Buy bottles. Buy an extra car seat base. Install car seat in my car. Finish packing hospital bag. Hang curtains in Emily's room. Buy a garbage can for diapers. Figure out where to store diapers. Shelves? A table? Get a baby book. Cook meals to freeze. Mop the floors. Clean the window sills. Clean the bathroom. Vaccum Emily's room. Clean the baseboards. Sweep the front porch. Finish editing wedding photos. Make wedding announcements. Order maternity photos. I haven't even looked at them all yet.
My brain was seriously out of control. I started to think that I needed to do all of this NOW. What if Emily shows up tomorrow? Some people call this the nesting instinct, but it felt more like sheer panic. I started to feel really overwhelmed and freaked out. I got home and didn't even say hello to Chris, I just started cleaning. He got up to help me, gave me a hug and I started crying. I started to think that I wasn't ready for a baby. If I can't keep the house in order when she's not here, how am I going to do it when she is?
Is this normal? Does every mother think like this at some point? Chris assured me that we would be fine. All of the things that I need to get for Emily aren't things we really need. We can change her on the floor if we don't have a changing table. But I don't want to change her on the floor. I want a table. I need a table. I continued to panic.
Chris made me sit down, but I couldn't relax. I started on dinner. He cleaned the windows and mopped the floors. He said he didn't want me to be upset, so he was fixing the problem. He told me that people have babies every day, and most people have no idea what they're doing at first. He said you learn as you go and no one expects you to be the perfect parent. I believed him, but by this point I was so upset I couldn't really think straight.
By the time I finished dinner, my back hurt so bad. I felt like I was going to be sick and I couldn't really eat. I felt better emotionally, but not so great physically. I was actually jealous that Chris was able to clean, sweep and mop so quickly and efficiently. I wish I could do everything, but my body won't let me. It's such a frustrating feeling. I'm so appreciative of his help, but I still feel like I should be doing it.
Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy and blessed to be pregnant. It's just a lot different than what I expected. Now that it's almost over, I'm realizing that it's just going to get harder. I'm looking forward to it, but I'm scared and nervous.
Showing posts with label cleaning. Show all posts
Showing posts with label cleaning. Show all posts
Friday, September 3, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
34 weeks!
I decided to switch it up a little and take my belly pictures from the other side. Whoa, I know. I'm so unpredictable. I also straightened my hair today. Watch out.
My pregnancy is still going well. Everything is normal, my doctor's visits are short, and I'm happy to know I've got a healthy bouncing baby girl cooking in there.
She's still a mover. Less kicks, more rolling. And hiccups. SO. MANY. HICCUPS. I feel bad for the girl, but at the same time I feel bad for me. She gets the hiccups every single night as I'm trying to fall asleep. I can feel her entire torso jump every time. It's the weirdest thing, and honestly I really don't like it that much. It just doesn't feel right! I don't mind her wiggles, but the hiccups are driving me crazy. I have to push (gently) to move her up a little when it happens, that seems to help.
Chris has been super helpful the past couple of weeks. He's always been helpful, but I wouldn't say "super" helpful, haha. He's been helping me cook dinner more often, actually does the dishes (without me saying anything), and does laundry occasionally. He also mows the lawn, takes out the trash, fixes things, moves the crib when I decide it's not close enough to the wall, all the man stuff. My favorite thing is when he does the dishes. For real.
It's the little things, guys. If you have a pregnant wife (wife, I'm allowed to say that now!), try to help her out as much as possible. Easy chores like sweeping and pulling laundry out of the dryer become very complicated tasks for a woman who is 8 months pregnant. Even cooking dinner. I have to stand a foot away from the stove and lean a little to get near a pan. Of course, if I stand for too long doing that (sweeping, cooking dinner or washing dishes), I start to get these lovely contractions.
Painful contractions. They wrap around from one side of my back across the bottom of my belly the whole way to the other side of my back. Some are just uncomfortable and if I walk around a bit or sit down they'll be fine. Others have me laying on my side swearing to Chris that I'm going to die in labor because I cannot take the pain. You all know by now that I'm a huge wuss, don't act surprised. Every time that happens Chris wants to take me to the hospital. Every time, I say "no, I'm fine" with teary eyes.
Hopefully when it's actually time to go to the hospital I let him take me. I have a feeling I will.
My pregnancy is still going well. Everything is normal, my doctor's visits are short, and I'm happy to know I've got a healthy bouncing baby girl cooking in there.
She's still a mover. Less kicks, more rolling. And hiccups. SO. MANY. HICCUPS. I feel bad for the girl, but at the same time I feel bad for me. She gets the hiccups every single night as I'm trying to fall asleep. I can feel her entire torso jump every time. It's the weirdest thing, and honestly I really don't like it that much. It just doesn't feel right! I don't mind her wiggles, but the hiccups are driving me crazy. I have to push (gently) to move her up a little when it happens, that seems to help.
Chris has been super helpful the past couple of weeks. He's always been helpful, but I wouldn't say "super" helpful, haha. He's been helping me cook dinner more often, actually does the dishes (without me saying anything), and does laundry occasionally. He also mows the lawn, takes out the trash, fixes things, moves the crib when I decide it's not close enough to the wall, all the man stuff. My favorite thing is when he does the dishes. For real.
It's the little things, guys. If you have a pregnant wife (wife, I'm allowed to say that now!), try to help her out as much as possible. Easy chores like sweeping and pulling laundry out of the dryer become very complicated tasks for a woman who is 8 months pregnant. Even cooking dinner. I have to stand a foot away from the stove and lean a little to get near a pan. Of course, if I stand for too long doing that (sweeping, cooking dinner or washing dishes), I start to get these lovely contractions.
Painful contractions. They wrap around from one side of my back across the bottom of my belly the whole way to the other side of my back. Some are just uncomfortable and if I walk around a bit or sit down they'll be fine. Others have me laying on my side swearing to Chris that I'm going to die in labor because I cannot take the pain. You all know by now that I'm a huge wuss, don't act surprised. Every time that happens Chris wants to take me to the hospital. Every time, I say "no, I'm fine" with teary eyes.
Hopefully when it's actually time to go to the hospital I let him take me. I have a feeling I will.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Thanks mom!
My mom is awesome, and I just want you to know that.
I already knew it, but she really showcased it this past week. While Audrey was in town, we took time off work as much as we could and relied on family to help us out on the days that we couldn't stay home. She stayed with some family on her mom's side during the day for a week, but we had a hard time getting them to bring her back at the end of the day because they wanted to spend time with her. No harm in that, it's just that we haven't seen her for 6 months and I really want Chris to see her as much as possible. Every hour is a big deal in my opinion.
So last week my mom agreed to watch Audrey during the day. Super. So, Chris will drop her off at your house on his way to work, yes? No, of course not! Mom woke up early every morning in order to get to our house 30 minutes away before I left for work. That way, miss sunshine doesn't have to be woken up at an ungodly hour and can start the day off right. Mom brought her coffee and hung out until the little monster awoke from her slumber.
She got her dressed and fed, sat through Chitty Chitty Bang Bang as many times as necessary, then took her to DS to play with Rachel and Melissa for a while. Audrey LOVES the big girls, she has so much fun with them and I think it makes her feel very important when the big girls play with her and give her attention. Mom took her to the Belterra pool just about every day she had her, which meant that bedtime wasn't very difficult as she was utterly exhausted from swimming for 2-3 hours straight every afternoon.
If that weren't enough, I got a phone call from my mom one morning while she was still in Blanco. She said "don't get mad at me." Uh oh, why? What could it be? It can't be that bad, can it?
She cleaned our house.
Oh! The horror! The outrage! My house is CLEAN?? And I didn't have to do it???
It was awesome. Apparently my dad's mom used to do this when I was younger, and my mom felt like she was telling her that she didn't do a good enough job cleaning. Not the case here. I know for a fact that I'm not doing a good enough job, but I really do try. I'm tired, we have a somewhat messy guest with us this month, and Chris, well, he doesn't really have any excuse not to help. His words, not mine. [Fun fact: He has been more helpful this past week. He even let me take a nap while he cooked dinner and tried his best to keep Audrey quiet.]
One day I came home from work and found out that my mother had not only cleaned our bathroom (bathroom cleaning = worst household chore EVER), but she had managed to cook us dinner while she was at it. How do moms do that? When Emily arrives, do I get magic powers? Please please please tell me I get magic powers. I could really use them.
I told her thank you. I really meant it. I feel like that's not enough, I don't know how else I can let her know how much I appreciate her help. I love you, mom! You're the best.
I already knew it, but she really showcased it this past week. While Audrey was in town, we took time off work as much as we could and relied on family to help us out on the days that we couldn't stay home. She stayed with some family on her mom's side during the day for a week, but we had a hard time getting them to bring her back at the end of the day because they wanted to spend time with her. No harm in that, it's just that we haven't seen her for 6 months and I really want Chris to see her as much as possible. Every hour is a big deal in my opinion.
So last week my mom agreed to watch Audrey during the day. Super. So, Chris will drop her off at your house on his way to work, yes? No, of course not! Mom woke up early every morning in order to get to our house 30 minutes away before I left for work. That way, miss sunshine doesn't have to be woken up at an ungodly hour and can start the day off right. Mom brought her coffee and hung out until the little monster awoke from her slumber.
She got her dressed and fed, sat through Chitty Chitty Bang Bang as many times as necessary, then took her to DS to play with Rachel and Melissa for a while. Audrey LOVES the big girls, she has so much fun with them and I think it makes her feel very important when the big girls play with her and give her attention. Mom took her to the Belterra pool just about every day she had her, which meant that bedtime wasn't very difficult as she was utterly exhausted from swimming for 2-3 hours straight every afternoon.
If that weren't enough, I got a phone call from my mom one morning while she was still in Blanco. She said "don't get mad at me." Uh oh, why? What could it be? It can't be that bad, can it?
She cleaned our house.
Oh! The horror! The outrage! My house is CLEAN?? And I didn't have to do it???
It was awesome. Apparently my dad's mom used to do this when I was younger, and my mom felt like she was telling her that she didn't do a good enough job cleaning. Not the case here. I know for a fact that I'm not doing a good enough job, but I really do try. I'm tired, we have a somewhat messy guest with us this month, and Chris, well, he doesn't really have any excuse not to help. His words, not mine. [Fun fact: He has been more helpful this past week. He even let me take a nap while he cooked dinner and tried his best to keep Audrey quiet.]
One day I came home from work and found out that my mother had not only cleaned our bathroom (bathroom cleaning = worst household chore EVER), but she had managed to cook us dinner while she was at it. How do moms do that? When Emily arrives, do I get magic powers? Please please please tell me I get magic powers. I could really use them.
I told her thank you. I really meant it. I feel like that's not enough, I don't know how else I can let her know how much I appreciate her help. I love you, mom! You're the best.
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