Full Term

Emily is full term this week! That means I'm ready for this little girl to come out now! My doctor told me she will only let me go 2 weeks past my due date... that's in a month! I could be induced the day after my due date (doctor thinks I'll be begging for it by then) but I'd like to give her more time to come out on her own. We'll see how I feel at that point if Emily hasn't shown up yet.

I've read that her growth will slow down now that she's full term. That's good news for me- I don't know how much bigger I can get! Some people have told me I look like I'm going to pop, and a lot of people keep telling me how small I am. I think I look about average? Aside from the back pain and heartburn, I still feel pretty good.

I'm feeling better about everything lately. Chris has been helping me calm down and I don't feel so stressed out today. He's been working overtime this weekend to make some extra money so we're not in a bind between maternity leave starting and my short term disability kicking in.

I'm finally working from home! Well, my mom's home. She lives 10 minutes from the hospital and has a faster internet connection. I'm also less distracted when I'm there. When I'm at my house, I want to clean up the house during my lunch break or wash a load of laundry while I'm waiting for a report to load. At my mom's house, I'm able to concentrate on work.

At my last appointment, the doctor told me that I'm 1cm dilated. Hooray progress! I go in again tomorrow for my (almost) 38 week appointment.


She has definitely dropped! Most of my shirts don't fit anymore because she hangs out of the bottom. Now we just have to wait! 18 more days!

Holy hurricane, batman.

I went back to work for one day this week. A hurricane hit the coast the day before and the storms finally made it to central Texas. Perfect day for a pregnant woman to drive an hour and a half away from her hospital.

I had to train my temp. That, my friends, is a blog for another day.

On the way to work, I was behind a school bus. I stayed back pretty far because there are CHILDREN on that bus and if I had to slam on my brakes I really don't want to slam into the back of a bus. Yes, it would hurt me more than anyone on the bus, but still. I know to stay back.
The car behind me with the bright ass halogen lights apparently does not know this rule. For 2 miles, they stayed right on my bumper, swerving back and forth to see if they could get around me. Did I mention it's raining so hard I can barely see the big yellow bus in front of me? I finally hit my brakes and pulled over. They happily passed me, flashed their hazards and proceeded to ride the school bus bumper another few miles.

I made it safely to work, attempted to train my temp and immediately wished I was anywhere but the office. This girl refuses to be taught and wants to just know what to do immediately. Anyway. The rain had stopped all day long. at 4:30, it started to pour again. Of course.

I got in my car and drove about 5mph through traffic. When traffic finally ended, I was able to get up to the breakneck speed of 30mph! By the time I got to Blanco, the sun was shining.

Chris and I drove around town and took pictures of the river running over the low water crossings, because that's what you do in a small town.

My bellybutton.

Ah, football.

I'm almost full term! Today is the first Texas game of the season, so naturally I took my photos wearing my burnt orange. Hook 'em!

Corporate America has crushed my soul.

So, I "officially" got approved to work from home for the second time. The last time it got pushed back a week. And a half. Then I brought in a doctor's note. I got approved. I was elated.

I left the office this afternoon thinking "I won't ever have to make this drive while pregnant ever again."

I got home. I relaxed for the first time in a looong time. I started a movie with Chris.

My phone rang.

"Hey Jessica, your temp got approved! Yayyy! Hey Jessica, we need you to come in to train her all next week! Yayyy!!!"

I should have said no! I should have said, "I'm sorry, but I really can't." But no. I said "sure, see you next week." Ugh, what is my problem! Maybe I can talk them into half days so I can miss traffic. Now my three day weekend has been ruined.

Good News.

This week isn't all bad. I don't want anyone to think I'm some Debbie Downer pregnant lady. I'm happy most of the time. I promise. Last week while Chris was out of town, I actually had fun. Normally I get worried when he's gone and call him every 5 minutes. I know, poor guy. I let him have his fun and wasn't worried at all. I really like the guys that he went with and actually slept well even though he was far away in another state. He called when he said he'd call and kept me updated on what was going on and I ended up having a relaxing weekend (aside from the odd massage appointment).

On Saturday, I went to visit Jamie at the farmer's market and got some super cute onesies for Emily.

I got a pedicure with Kristen, Courtney and Jenny on Saturday. My toes are now this color:

It was nice to finally spend some time with the girls. We went to lunch at Pei Wei before our pedicures. My fortune cookie said "Luck will visit you on the next new moon." We started thinking it meant Emily's arrival, but the next new moon is next Wednesday! The following new moon is October 7th, a date I've had stuck in my head. Maybe the fortune cookie was a month off. Maybe it was just a cookie. The back of the fortune told me how to say "mustache" in chinese.

As much as I worry, we really do have Emily's room pretty much ready. I still want to get new cushions for the rocking chair, a table for a lamp and a little organizer for diaper stuff to put on the table.

Here's her crib. I still have those 3 little pillow looking things that are meant to be hung on the wall. I'm just not sure where they should go yet.

This is the bookshelf that my mom gave to us and Chris stained. It looks awesome. My math teacher from high school, Mr. Grabman, gave us all of the books on the shelves. It's a great collection and we're so thankful that he passed them down to us!

Here's Roger displaying Emily's bathtime basket. He needs a bath.

Emily's closet. All of her clothes are washed and hung up.

I've been having some trouble with work, but finally got the official approval to start working from home next week!!!

This is SUCH a relief. They probably won't find a temp for me while I'm working from home, and I do feel kind of bad that they may be left without anyone to do my job when Emily is here, but... it's not my problem anymore! Hooray for doctor's notes.

Update on my doctor appointment last week: No progress. Not dilated. Looks like Emily will be sticking it out for the long haul!

36 weeks, panic sets in.

Yesterday on my way home from work I started to think about everything I needed to get done.

Stop at the store for dinner, drive home. Put away the clean dishes. Wash dirty dishes. Empty Chris' lunchbox. Take the clean clothes out of the dryer, start a new load. Peel the shrimp, cut up the vegetables, cook dinner. Take a shower. Dry the new load of laundry. Wash dinner dishes.

This then led to me starting to think about everything I need to get done in the next few weeks.

Buy a pack n play. Buy nursing bras. Buy bottles. Buy an extra car seat base. Install car seat in my car. Finish packing hospital bag. Hang curtains in Emily's room. Buy a garbage can for diapers. Figure out where to store diapers. Shelves? A table? Get a baby book. Cook meals to freeze. Mop the floors. Clean the window sills. Clean the bathroom. Vaccum Emily's room. Clean the baseboards. Sweep the front porch. Finish editing wedding photos. Make wedding announcements. Order maternity photos. I haven't even looked at them all yet.

My brain was seriously out of control. I started to think that I needed to do all of this NOW. What if Emily shows up tomorrow? Some people call this the nesting instinct, but it felt more like sheer panic. I started to feel really overwhelmed and freaked out. I got home and didn't even say hello to Chris, I just started cleaning. He got up to help me, gave me a hug and I started crying. I started to think that I wasn't ready for a baby. If I can't keep the house in order when she's not here, how am I going to do it when she is?

Is this normal? Does every mother think like this at some point? Chris assured me that we would be fine. All of the things that I need to get for Emily aren't things we really need. We can change her on the floor if we don't have a changing table. But I don't want to change her on the floor. I want a table. I need a table. I continued to panic.

Chris made me sit down, but I couldn't relax. I started on dinner. He cleaned the windows and mopped the floors. He said he didn't want me to be upset, so he was fixing the problem. He told me that people have babies every day, and most people have no idea what they're doing at first. He said you learn as you go and no one expects you to be the perfect parent. I believed him, but by this point I was so upset I couldn't really think straight.

By the time I finished dinner, my back hurt so bad. I felt like I was going to be sick and I couldn't really eat. I felt better emotionally, but not so great physically. I was actually jealous that Chris was able to clean, sweep and mop so quickly and efficiently. I wish I could do everything, but my body won't let me. It's such a frustrating feeling. I'm so appreciative of his help, but I still feel like I should be doing it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm so happy and blessed to be pregnant. It's just a lot different than what I expected. Now that it's almost over, I'm realizing that it's just going to get harder. I'm looking forward to it, but I'm scared and nervous.